Saturday, December 17, 2011

Stupid Gifts for 2011

Are you panicked about Christmas yet? I am. Or, are you one of those organized (sick) people that have been collecting things for family members since last year’s after Christmas sale? We celebrate Christmas with my side of the family this coming Sunday. That leaves me two days to prepare. So far, I have my Mom done. On Christmas Day we celebrate Christmas with my husband’s family, that’s nine days if you’re keeping track. I only have my husband done.
I hate crowds and I hate shopping. So, I thought I would check the internet for ideas. Armed with a list, I plan to arrive at the store, and get in and out of chaos without aimlessly wandering around in a panic. I Googled the top Christmas gifts of 2011. I wasn’t sure if the stupid gifts on the list were the top gifts purchased in 2011, or if it is all the crap left from last year that the merchants desperately need to peddle.
For the low, low, low price of $39.99 I could purchase a remote control pillow. Huh? Do you move the pillow around the bed with a controller? No. It is a universal remote for you television, so you don’t misplace it. Too bad I have a Husky with separation anxiety that chews on anything fluffy.
Just in time for Christmas for the criminal in your family, a $35.00 beanie hat. What’s so special about the hat? It has an adjustable beard. Wear the hat and beard. Rob the convenience store. Fold away detachable beard. Run.
There is a microbrew of the month club for $31.95 a month. For a year the recipient will receive 12 bottles of beer each month. Well, for $15 a month I can buy my brother-in-law a 30 pack and that would at least get him through a night.
Perhaps a variety of e-books would be a better, easier, one size fits all gift. Champagne Books is having an amazing sale going on in December. On Thursday December 22nd, Bolt Action will be available for 0.99! Check it out, there is a book for everyone
In Action Thriller, Bolt Action Detective Leslie Bolt is a smart talking, gun hording, Harley riding investigator forced to work a serial murder case with her sexy ex-lover. After a childhood of abuse suffered at the hand of her father, Leslie sleeps with a Ruger Blackhawk .357 under her pillow, has a Browning A-Bolt Stainless Stalker rifle in her broom closet, and a Saturday Night Special stashed in her road-hog cookie jar. The body count mounts, and Detective Bolt must conquer her own past, as she races to capture “The State Quarter Killer” before her sister is the next victim. Secrets of the past, murder, deception, sexual tension, and “The State Quarter Killer”, Bolt Action offers it all.


Julie Eberhart Painter said...

Those are some pretty stupid gifts. Desperate people, only, need apply.

Good idea to mention the book sale. Yours in the 22nd. Mine the 20th for Mortal Coil. Feel like yelling ONE DAY ONLY; STEP RIGHT UP.

Debbie said...

I can't stand shopping in crowds either.

A remote control pillow though? LOL

My Husky has a love for digging holes..deep ones.

Thanks for the information about your book, it looks wonderful!

Victoria Roder said...

The worst gift ever, was my friend got a scale "to keep track of her weight", from her mother-in-law. She didn't ask for a scale

Julie Eberhart Painter said...

She didn't ask for that mother-in-law either, I'd bet!

Victoria Roder said...

Too funny, Julie!

Michele said...

Sorry, I am one of "those" people this year. Shopping done 9 days before Christmas, decorations and tree up. But that isn't always the case, believe me!
One year I did have all my shopping done by July 4. But that was really unusual.